the dentist's office

I just hate that feeling - well, I hate a lot of feelings - the uncomfortable ones. The ones where you realize you would much rather be running in the opposite direction, or hiding, or bawling, than sitting in the dentists chair, or even driving to the dentist, or forgetting your wallet on the bench in the airport, or misplacing your keys, or making a speech, or asking for forgiveness.

I finally kicked myself in the rear end and went for a small check-up at a dentist. Not my dentist, he was away on holidays. So I phoned up some dentist I don't know and asked if they could fit me in today or tomorrow. Yes they could. 1:40. I went to brush my teeth and floss and had a thought. Maybe I can see a dark spot in this tooth that is giving me so much pain when I drink, eat and even breath... WHOA! There is a fricking hole in my tooth! The sickening feeling floods my stomach. The dreaded drive. The nerve wracking wait in the chair. The feared words "root canal... crown... $1,500".
Bright side - I actually have that money. Down side - Its being saved for school in the fall, I had barely saved much, and now this. Such is life - C'est la vie...?? is that right?

up in the orchard

I just asked if she had ever heard a Meadowlark (I think they are just marvelously thrilling to the ears, knowing that spring is just around the corner when you hear their first song of the season). She said no (I should have known - there aren't any Meadowlarks in Kelowna).  Then she said she would love to read about how I would describe the things that I have seen and the places I've been, and I guess, the things I will see and the places I am going. So, here I am, blogging. 

I am currently visiting Kelowna, British Columbia. I would say up to this point in my life, it is my hometown. Downtown Kelowna is one of my favorite places to be in the summer. It is still such a "small town" downtown. Hardly any high-rise buildings and not too too many people, just the perfect amount for the people watcher that I am. I wish staring was socially acceptable. 

I used to just love Kelowna, or maybe I should say I used to be so content living here. It definitely is a most beautiful place with its lake and big mountains surrounding it in the cozy little valley. I just am realizing it isn't the be-all end-all place for me. I actually would go so far as to say I would be perfectly happy never living here again. I love visiting though, it is the people that make Kelowna beautiful to me now. (I talk as though I have been gone years - it's only been three months that I have not been living in Kelowna) 

I think these feelings and thoughts on the matter is the way God is preparing me for leaving for good. I have been feeling a bit homeless. I wasn't really settling down in Lucky Lake, Saskatchewan - where I have been for the last three months, living with my parents, working on a seed potato farm, because I knew I was going to be having an extended visit to Kelowna, and then eventually making my way east for school in the fall. So here I am, knowing, but not knowing what my little future holds. I am half excitement, half worry. I think thats the place where the majority of the people in this world live.

I don't want every entry of this blog to be like this one - long and "dear diary-ish" . I hope that this can be a way of processing things going on in my life by spewing them out here on these pages as well as telling some funny stories in hopes of making someone laugh. I love making people laugh, not so much for their sake, but mine. The word ego-centric comes to my mind. Is that the right word? Oh well. So here begins the journey - places, please.